Dear Editor:
I am writing to bring light upon the controversy behind Harford County Public School’s dress code. Many students believe the dress code restricts females in making decisions about their image. Instead of teaching boys to not be distracted by a girl’s body, this code seems to suggest that girls instead should cover up. At Bel Air, girls and boys alike had planned to break the dress code Friday, November 21st to seek reform in the policy. This protest will no longer be taking place, for some understandable reasons regarding discipline. Despite this, I do not want the important message behind this protest to disappear. This is the idea that the dress code condones the sexualization of young girls and rape culture.
The ideas behind our school dress code will carry on into our adult lives. Even in modern day, women are fired from their jobs because they are deemed too “tempting” to their male contemporaries. Situations like this, and rape culture, all starts at a young age. There have been too many instances where a woman is blamed for being raped because of what she was wearing. Because “Sally” was wearing a short, tight dress, she deserves to suffer from sexual assault. This directly reflects the attitude of “you’re going to cover your body because men can’t control themselves.”
I am a senior at Bel Air, and have sought change through multiple means. I first wrote an article for my school newspaper, the Bellarion, analyzing how the dress code impacts young women. Next, I met with a member of the Board of Education, but then discovered the Board does not actually have power in the matter, it is the Superintendent that decides the dress code. So, I contacted the Superintendent, and then the Executive Director for Middle and High School Performance. I was told by the Executive Director that the dress code is made to “create and preserve a positive climate for teaching and learning,” so no reform would pursued. I replied to this email by pointing out faults in the current code and that it is a pressing issue in Harford County, and got no response.
I do not think the dress code in HCPS creates a “positive climate” for girls at all. In fact, just the opposite. Many girls are taken out of their classes to change their clothes. This leaves them distracted, and sobbing, in many cases.
A close friend of mine, model student, member of student government, and captain of both soccer and lacrosse teams, has unfortunately been a victim of this. She was wearing a slightly sheer secretary blouse, with a bandeau under. She was pulled out of her AP Psychology class. While being told to change, a variety of comments was said that made this young girl cry, like many others like her, instead of letting them focus on their studies. She came to my class after the incident, and I had to console her. Instead of boys being distracted by girls’ “inappropriate” clothing, this policy results in girls being distracted by being pulled out of their classes to change. This student also got a call to home saying she would be suspended for any more offenses. Just for a dress code violation.
I do not think any comments stated about girl’s clothing choice is intentionally said to destroy her, it is just a misunderstanding. Teachers and administration sometimes think what they’re saying is positive and realistic constructive criticism to help girls succeed. Fortunately, times have changed, and young women no longer need these constraints and guidance. We are capable of making our own decisions, and not being told to change because of what others, male or female, think of us. Slut shaming, or abasing girls solely on their image, is never appropriate.
I understand the dress code is in place for sanitary reasons as well, but I do not think a bandeau has an effect on anyone’s health.
I am not necessarily advocating the abolishment of the dress code. I think we need reform. Many girls get punished for showing minimal amounts of skin of their midriff and shoulders. Nothing about a girl’s midriff or shoulders is inappropriate.
Despite the fact my article previously mentioned was reviewed before it was posted last spring, it was recently altered. My article’s title, “the Dress Code Dilemma” and photograph I took was still on the Bellarion’s website. The content of my article, although, was replaced. When I informed the newspaper’s advisor that my article was altered, and my work plagiarized, they told me the article was taken down for not being “factual.” Although, my article was published in the opinion section, and was previously approved. It was not factual, to my understanding, because I mentioned too much about other schools, and didn’t focus on Bel Air High specifically enough. The purpose of including other similar stories across the country was to point out that this is a movement that has credibility, not a fabricated issue created at one lone high school. Also, another article was written supporting the dress code, with equal “factual” content. Their article still remains. I attached that link to my article in my college applications. I had to inform the colleges I applied to that the story published was not actually mine. [Note: Brett’s original article appears below.]
The protest that has been sparked at Bel Air now has the entire school talking about women’s rights, rape culture, and the role young people play in it. I have been called a “slut”, and many other things, as a result of my activism on my school. When deep rooted prejudices are shaken, there is bound to be backlash. I never expected such nasty things to be said to my face. I have been told by multiple young men that the dress code should remain the same because “you can’t teach not to rape,” so therefore, “covering girls up will reduce the temptation.” I will never cover up my body because a man is tempted to rape. They should not rape me because rape is wrong, end of story. The dress code upholds these dangerous ideas many young people have, changing the code will change minds.
So no, the dress code does not “create and preserve a positive climate for teaching and learning.” It does exist for reasonable purposes, like preventing sanitary issues and obscenity. More often, though, the dress code is a vehicle to impress societal norms and prejudices upon young girls. I urge anyone who has concerns, to voice them. Please send your thoughts on how the dress code can be reformed to create a more positive environment for young girls in Harford County to the Superintendent.
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Editor’s Note: Harford County Public Schools spokeswoman Jillian Lader said Tuesday afternoon that the school system was aware of the planned protest.
“Bel Air High school administrators follow and enforce school rules, including that of the dress code, every day,” Lader said in an e-mail. “They will follow and enforce school rules on Friday as they do every other day.”
“Stories written for the Bellarion are regularly rotated, as on any news site,” she added. “The decision may be made by Bellarion staff, advisors or school administrators.”
Brett’s original Bellarion article follows:
At Bel Air High School, we have a dress code, but not many have actually questioned the motives behind it. This dress code is designed to mold the choices girls make about their image.
Now, many may disagree. Surely, boys too can wear inappropriate clothing! Girls are just more likely to wear suggestive garments! The second bullet in the Bel Air High School Student Planner states: “Shirts that expose or reveal skin or undergarments such as all tank tops, tube tops, halter tops, mesh tops, bare midriff tops and spaghetti straps” are not acceptable.
Last time I checked, I have never seen any male at this school wear a tube, halter, mesh, bare midriff, or spaghetti strap top. If that’s still not convincing, notice the word undergarments in this statement. Only girls wear undergarments on the top half of their body.
The third bullet in the planner reads: “Clothing worn in such a manner so as to reveal undergarments or bare skin between the upper chest and mid-thigh is not permitted.”
It is highly uncommon to see a male that wears clothing revealing a region between their upper chest and mid-thigh. Only for a girl is it socially acceptable to wear a shirt that shows their midriff.
The third bullet in the planner reads: “Skirts, dresses, and shorts must be no shorter than the student’s longest fingertip when the students’ hands are held at his/her side.”
Already, we can see that skirts and dresses target females. In addition, it’s only socially acceptable for girls to wear shorts above the knee.
These rules can be found in page 22 of the Bel Air High School Student planner under “Personal Responsibilities” and “Dress”, so let’s cut to the chase. Why do we need such dress code regulations? Maybe it’s because we want our students to project an image of respectfulness and excellence. In that case, sweatpants and pajamas are just as detrimental to this image. Why don’t we create rules against informal clothing?
Obviously, wearing respectful clothing isn’t the issue. If it was, we wouldn’t be allowed to wear “lazy” articles of clothing like sweatshirts and t-shirts. The reason girls don’t have the freedom to wear what they want, is due to their male peers. A female student In Harford County Public Schools cannot wear shorts above their fingertips, simply because it is a distraction to boys.
Let’s say the tables are turned. Suddenly, all females in the school become infatuated with male ankles. We constantly stare at them in class, harass, and objectify the boys for it. In efforts to stop this conflict, the school denies boys the right to expose their ankles. Is this morally right? Absolutely not. Instead of teaching girls to control themselves and respect their peers, they tell the boys to cover themselves up. These same issues are unfolding across the country.
Recently at New Haven Middle School in Indiana, female students have protested against their school’s sexist dress code. One sign in the school reads, “Are my pants lowering your test scores?”
The ideas behind our school dress code will carry on into our adult lives. Even in modern day, women are fired from their jobs because they are deemed too “tempting” to their male contemporaries. Situations like this, and rape culture, all starts at a young age. There have been too many instances where a woman is blamed for being raped because of what she was wearing. Because Sally was wearing a short, tight dress, she deserves to suffer from sexual assault. This directly reflects the attitude of “you’re going to cover your body because men can’t control themselves.”
No longer should girls live circumspectly because of what boys expect from them. It is the school’s job to protect the rights of young women, so they can grow to live freely and unbound by society’s expectations.
Although I don’t agree that dress codes should be changed to allow more freedom, I agree that both sexes should be subject to the same rules. I applaud students who protest for their beliefs. My question about school dress codes in general is this: why are the female sports uniforms given a free pass for violations? Most field hockey or cheer-leading uniforms are often more revealing than the dress code allows. If there is a code, enforcement should be consistent.
Both male and female students are subject to the same rules… the editorial fails to mention it. If the current style for young men were cut-off jean shorts and see through tops, they would be subject to the same penalty. This issue stemmed from “toga day” during homecoming week, where a very large portion of the senior class (girls and guys alike) were penalized for not following the dress code and were forced to make alterations to their toga or remove it entirely. Most of the problems were due to an “uncovered shoulder,” and despite the fact that this rule applied to both male and female students alike, some students were determined to dramatize the issue.
As far as sports uniforms are concerned, while some sports (such as field hockey) adhere to the rules and are permitted to wear their uniforms during the school day, other sports (such as cheerleading) do not meet dress code requirements and are only allowed to wear their uniforms during sanctioned events.
I’m not saying these students do not have a write to speak their mind and fight for their rights. But it’s very ironic that this story first took shape in a journalism class – someone must be teaching our future writers the importance of senationalism.
As a student at Bel air, and a male, I can say that makes are females are absolutely not held to the same standards when it comes to dress code. Males are not disciplined for wearing tank tops, exposing under garments, or anything otherwise in appropriate (i.e. sexualized or drug related shirts).
This being said, as a female, I would be fed up with the inequality. And what message does it send? Males can show arms and under garments because they’re “just guys” but girls can’t do the same or equivalents because they are a distraction? In no scenario should a female be made to feel like an object that just might distract males.
The school system absolutely has its own rights to create and enforce any dress code policy that they deem fit, but when they do so, they must enforce the rules equally across genders. At very least, they should recognize a female student’s irritation with the inequality as valid, which the school system has not done.
Female students aren’t pleading for the right to dress in very sexualized ways, they are only asking for equality. As a male and a senior who has never been effected by the dress code in any way, I have no dog in this fight. I do not gain or lose anything either way, but I am speaking for what is right for all students.
Lastly, don’t believe that this idea was sparked by one teacher or discussion in a journalism class. Although students are 15 – 18 years old, we are vey capable of our own thoughts and motivations.
This article isn’t about condemning the school system for their rules, it is about holding it accountable for its execution of these rules; it is about equality, for all students, and fighting for equality at a young age prepares individuals to do and accept the same in the future.
The dress code does apply to sports uniforms. I played field hockey for a high school in Harford County. We would regularly wear our uniforms during the school day in order to help increase school spirit for sports teams and encourage students to come to our games. However, several times, my friends and I were told to change because our skirts were a dress code violation, even though they were mid-thigh length and had shorts underneath.
Well i’m not wearing a knee length skirt with my cheerleading uniform so no.
I cannot believe the article I just read! How about saving the skimpy, tight, revealing clothing for the night clubs and parties! It does not belong in our schools! I have three teens and I am saddened when I see these young girls that feel the need to show off all they have, obviously for attention. Nothing left to the imagination these days!
As far as school/work place goes, it is not appropriate! There are rules for a reason in our country and if you don’t follow them, you are punished. Maybe if a girl doesn’t like being called out for her clothing, follow the rules and that won’t happen.
Do you really think you flaunting your body round a bunch of boys going through puberty is not distracting to their education, you are wrong! How about the young male teachers who are trying to do their job but have to stare at cleavage or can see up a skirt while trying to teach a class. God forbid he asks you to cross your legs or wear an appropriate top, he then gets charged with a sexual harassment charge!
There definitely needs to be a dress code and I believe one that is MUCH stricter then what they have now.
In school it was always obvious when the teachers wouldn’t call on a girl who they thought would show too much skin up at the board, or a male who was trying to hide a physical reaction to visual stimulus…
Kharn. You are such a weirdo. Your comments range from ultra right wing conservative nonsense, to juvenile memories of boners and breasts in high school. What is wrong with you?
(we all know you never actually graduated from high school)
I am so sorry for your children.
I’ll pray for you
I think you misunderstood the point of her article. She was not saying that she wanted to wear skimpy or tight clothing to school, she mentioned ‘sally’ as an example of an older woman not in school. This girl simply wants to be able to feel good about herself while getting dressed for school without worrying about being slut shamed. There are many cute off the shoulder tops, that are normally long sleever and only reveal shoulders that are banned with such a dress code – but lets be honest here-who is sexually attracted to shoulders? The dress code should be reformed, to reflect part of todays fashion and to promote confidence instead of shamimg and covering up. Boys and girls alike will be distracted by those they are attracted throughout high school, regardless of what is being worn. If you are that worried about your children and don’t trust that you raised them correctly, send them to a same sex private school and have them wear a uniform every day. And if a male teacher does not have self control to save his thoughtsfor when he gets home, he shouldn’t be teaching at that age level.
As far as ‘rules in our country’, last time I checked, this is a free country and the first amendment allows me to wear whatever I please.
Try to understand that times are changing now, feminism is growing stronger and stronger and double standards are being fought to be demolished, and those in positions of power should be able to see this and allow the changing society to reflect within their decisions.
I hope you realize how stupid and sexist you sound
I believe that the dress code should be applied and enforced the same over both genders. No one should wear short shorts or should expose any bit of crack, cleavage or undergarment. Fair is fair! Cover it up and you won’t get called to the office.
I would encourage you to try some form of dress code protest on Friday November 21st. It would be very interesting to see what students wear to school during American Education Week while their guardians, parents and grandparents are visiting the schools.
I can’t say I totally agree with the dress code but. In the real world an employee must dress and look like a professional it is sad to say but even today it is difficult for an female to be taken seriously in corp. America don’t think it does not matter how you dress it very much does!
I agree a dress code is needed, I agree it needs to be enforced fairly on both boys and girls, I agree sports uniforms (cheer, volleyball) go against it, but I do agree it could be tweaked…start a dialouge. Mainly shorts on girls with long legs could be on a case-by-case basis (if you’ve ever tried to find them you know what I mean). My daughter would be in violation every day and she wasn’t showing too much of anything! Anyway, I’m more concerned with is the lack of parental guidance…do you know what you’re kids are wearing? Also, why isn’t it mandatory for the administration (those responsible for enforcing said policy) required to take sensitivity training (or similar) on how to deliver it? In the business world managers are required to or could open the company up to a lawsuit. To the girl trying to make change I applaud you but remember sometimes you are successful and sometimes you’re not…sometimes you have to accept it. But you’ve started something that others will surely be glad to pick up the torch and carry on.
School is a place for a structured learning environment, not a place to show off you God given looks. School uniforms is the answer. Everyone dresses the same, no need for self expression.
You sound miserable. Little boxes on the hillside little boxes made of ticky tacky ….& they all look just the same…
Then you pay for everyone to wear a uniform. They can be expensive. Not everyone living in that area has a disposable income. There are a good bit who make enough to just take care of the bills and the basics. Maybe the parents should teach their kids to dress appropriately and this would be a non issue.
Why is it always the people you assume would have the lowest amount of disposable income are the ones with the $200 sneakers and $100 professional sports jerseys?
Khakis, polos, and black sneakers are cheap at Wal-mart.
Yes they can be however, it counts as an extra expense. As a former HS student in the Harford country scroll system , we went thrift store shopping a lot. We did not buy $200 shoes or $100 jerseys. My parents also made sure we didn’t walk out looking like hooligans. If jeans so much as had a hole in them they were not worn to school. Sounds like you are looking for an excuse. Teach your kids to dres and let the teachers do their job and worry about teaching. Since it sounds like you have a disposable income, I see no reason why that would be a challenge for you.
If you want it that way then take your counties tax dollars and buy uniforms for all the kids. If it is law that the kids must attend school, then you make it a rule to require a uniform, then you should provide it. Its not a law to require a uniform, yet you think the parents should absorb an additional cost of providing clothing that will only be used during school? Some can’t afford it. Once again, I think you’re over reaching on the control you should have over people. The reasoning of uniforms effecting behavior and grades is completely flawed and inconclusive. What is your real purpose? Other than stripping away yet another personal freedom….
Dress Code? I don’t have time to read this nonsense. My tax dollars, your parents tax dollars, etc pay for your schooling. If you do not like it, demand to you parents to go to a new school. What pisses me off is I see a lack of dress code. How many idiot kids do you see TODAY when its 20 Degrees outside wearing shorts and flip flops? Seems to me that parents are not teaching their kids from EARLY ON to cover up, be smart. You kids think its COOL. When we were kids if it was no 90 Degrees or hotter we could not wear shorts! Get a life kid, go get a job, and tell your boss that you want to wear your skimpy crap to work at McDonald’s while you operate a grease fryer. Much easier way to wax your hair off.
This is the most ignorant and disgusting thing..coming from an adult. You must work at McDonald’s yourself 🙂 you don’t seem quite educated. All the other responses acknowledge the different perspectives and counter them in a productive way but yours is unecessary, and overall immature for a “parent”. You grow up kid and maybe go back to school or something because you clearly have no idea how to act about issues today in schools or society for that matter. Regardless of how you see the issue, respond in a way that reflects it- rather than your trashy personality.
Taylor, your reply is immature for an “adult”. Before you call someone out for being uneducated, you should check your grammar and spelling.
Would YOU like fries with that?
I though his comment was very well thought out. I’ve read some of your posts, hardly stellar. Would YOU like fries with that?
If you really wanna get technical, if the student has a job at McDonald’s and pays taxes, they should have a say in the matter. Mostly, because they help fund that school system. Also, AJ, your tax dollars are hard at work because that school is teaching something that is in The First Amendment. Freedom of Press and freedom of protest.
Forget about our rights, King Obama is going to squash all our rights.
I can’t wait, hope it happens soon cause he is on the way out…..
You know the easiest way to avoid being called out of class to have your dress code violations addressed? Don’t break the rules– then there are no issues. This is one of the most unbelievable things I have ever read. No one, including other students, wants to see female students wearing see through shirts, cleavage hanging out or shorts so short that it is almost pointless to be wearing them.
Also, there are definitely dress code issue with boys as well they are just not as prominent because they usually surround pants being worn too low. For the most part, their bodies are covered so the issues are different.
I guess uniforms would solve this issue and make it fair for everyone.
The kids are there to get an education PERIOD. Most of these kids think school is a place to hang out with their friends. Kids that have parents with money wear more expensive clothes and mock kids that don’t. When these poor kids cannot take anymore of the bullying they end up committing acts of violence. Kids don’t need $100 sneakers, $150 jerseys, $400 iphones, and $250 beats headphones in schools to get an education.
All kids in public school should be required to have a dress code. Button down white shirts and khaki pants for boys and slacks or long dresses for girls. If you want to send your kid to school with $1000 worth of stuff to go to a public school then fork up some extra money and send your kids to private school.
Why are parents allowing their children to wear the clothing in the first place? If the clothing isn’t purchased, it can’t be worn. I know that mindset is old fashioned, but it works. I refuse to buy my daughter any pants that have “dream” or “sexy” or any other word emblazoned across the backside. The result? No one is “reading” her buttocks. I don’t allow my daughter to wear a “slightly” sheer blouse anywhere. The result? No one knows what she’s wearing under it.
You can’t simply wear what you want to wear and then tell others they can’t and/or shouldn’t notice. There is nothing wrong with being told to “cover up” – boys and girls. I don’t want to see a girl’s bra or a boy’s underwear! If you want the world to see your belly button, wear a bikini to the beach, not to school. And boys, the only ones who care if you wear boxers or briefs are yourselves, so pull your damn pants up!
I understand this young lady’s attempt to change the rules, but pick something else. Want to express yourself? Make a statement with your grades. Volunteer your time at a soup kitchen. Pick a service project that will impact your community – clothe just one homeless person, adopt a local family who has fallen on hard times, clean an elderly neighbor’s yard for a year. Lead by example that way, and you will always win.
Your answer is “Get back in the kitchen little lady”? Thank goodness you weren’t fighting for women’s rights to vote.
I think you responded to the wrong post – or do you really not understand what the poster said?
He was being sarcastic, dork.
At no point did I even suggest young ladies head back to the kitchen. Aren’t you just a bit full of yourself?
SELF expression comes from what’s on the inside, not by what you wear on the outside. So, GO OUT AND BE THE CHANGE YOU SAY YOU WANT TO SEE! Otherwise, you are nothing more than a talking head.
And by the way, I’ve sat at the crosswalks after school, watching groups of children leisurely saunter across the street. Most everyone is dressed alike – same style of clothing and accessories, but different colors.
You are correct. Way too much time in the school day is spent on dress code and an inordinate ammout of that wasted time seems to be focused on the girls. Equality is the answer and nothing says equality to me like a pair of khaki pants and a polo shirt. A “uniform” approach if you will. Just a few years ago the school board was close to approving uniforms in Harford County public schools. Your fight may be just the catalist needed to revive that conversation. Thank you for your inspiration. Please reschedule your protest day and have all your friends post photos. You’re awesome!!!
I guess we could create Bel Air High School For Girls and Bel Air High School For Boys. It would be interesting to see if both sexes still dressed in a provocative/gangsta type style. What is the rationale for this young lady when it comes to males raping males? She needs to take some advanced coursework in Endocrinology. If a male and/or female can’t have the understanding of how their actions, physical and emotional, impact their classmates, maybe he/she needs additional education in compassion and civility. We all understand that the criminal act of rape is unrelated to the attire one chooses. I guess HCPS’ should change the dress code to no dress code. Where what you want, if anything at all. I don’t see military service to our country in Ms. Brett’s future, based purely on rules and dress code.
HCPS should mandate school uniforms for everyone.
Khaki slacks and polo shirts in their class color (red for freshman, blue for sophomores, etc) for all students, every day. School is not the club, they’re allowed to prohibit sheer clothing, short skirts/shorts, exposed underwear or arm pits, etc. Just like boys cannot wear see-through tops, girls cannot, boys cannot wear short-shorts, neither can girls, boys cannot expose their underwear, neither can girls.
Too many parents cannot say no to their children’s wardrobe choices, or they complain that they can’t find age-appropriate clothing at the mall. Land’s End has all the modest clothing you could want, stand up to your kids and explain that you’re the parent and not their friend.
From the article: “Already, we can see that skirts and dresses target females. In addition, it’s only socially acceptable for girls to wear shorts above the knee.”
The Wall Street Journal had an article in May of this year advocating for 5″ inseam shorts for men, vs more common 11, 9, or 7″ shorts (11″ falls above the knee on a full-grown male). Just because they’re not something you see in school doesn’t mean the choice isn’t out there or popular in some circles, but those shorts are equally banned as the same size shorts for girls.
You’ve likely never stepped foot into John Carroll… The uniforms didn’t stop the teen pregnancies or the cat calling. That was back in the 90s.
That would be wear not where what you want, if anything at all. I need basic coursework in editing before clicking! Those darn homophones…..
The slut shaming continues from women and men alike……#iamnotadistraction
Stop dressing like a Route 40 stripper and you won’t be a distraction.
Thanks for proving this young girl’s point. Your deviant thoughts are your problem and unfortunately you have made them society’s. Women must keep up the fight against the deviants and those that accept and perpetuate this deviant thought behavior like the commenters on this board.
What point was proven? Clothes do define and suggest much about who you are as a person. When I go to the doctor’s office I expect the doctor to be dressed professionally. A professional doctor that is, not a professional prostitute. The comment actually reveals the ridiculous nature of this young lady’s argument.
My thoughts exactly. I think the young lady sounds ignorant of the real world in which you are expected to dress appropriately. It sounds like she wants to blame the fact that a dress code is needed on men. BTW the rule about short shorts applies to both genders!!!!
Translation: “Clothes do define and suggest much about who I, can’t spot em, am as a person.”
No faux populism here please. Perhaps many wouldn’t care for your taste in fashion. One person’s idea of looking good, doesn’t mean they actually look good. Take the toupee for example. The guy thinks he looks good, but most everyone else does not. One just has to look at the inordinate amount of fashion disasters in any mall in America, older mall walkers and the young graphic tee crowd (ambercrombie, etc.), to realize this. Most of them think they look good.
sweatpea,
With all due repsect, we’re not talking about people liking my fashion. We’re not talking about people strolling at a mall. We’re talking about students in school for a purpose. We’re talking about professionals in settings where certain professional dress is expected. Keep on topic.
Now, if you care to make an argument that my valuable tax dollars going to the purpose of the activity in that building; that is, her learning in a publicly funded school; is secondary to her desire to dress as she wishes – go ahead. Make the argument.
If you wish to continue re-phrase my words, go ahead as well. I must say, though, when your comments focus on the ad hominen it says plenty about what your argument contains. Ha, more so than what you are wearing when you say it.
Can’t spot ’em. You need to stay focused. You weren’t talking about the school, you were talking about the doctor’s office and prostitutes and how you think you dress appropriately and everybody else is up for debate. Faux populism is not ad hominem. When one person claims to speak the truth for others, it is Faux Populism. I don’t wish my tax dollars to be used to shame young girls which produces the cycle of shaming and their enablers like the commenters on this board. I will leave it at that because:
“Don’t wrestle with pigs (deviants and their enablers), because you get dirty and the pigs (deviants and their enablers) like it.”
sweatpea,
In your other posts I can see your confusion… Actually I’ve never said anything about what I wear, only what I expect others to wear. I expect a doctor to dress professionally, well, because s/he is a doctor. Not being a doctor nor claiming initially to be one… is that clearer?
I understand your ‘faux populism’ accusation… the ad hominen observation sticks.
Lastly, if my request is simply that people dress appropriately for the setting in which they are found, and that makes me a deviant or an enabler?!?! Guilty as charged in your interesting little world.
Dress codes are necessary in schools. Teens and kids shouldn’t be too revealing, its distracting from their studies. However, I am against a uniform as it takes from a persons individuality and character. Common sense should be used in dress code enforcement. If its not a distraction then why worry with it……..
Research has shown that at public schools with uniforms there are less disciplinary problems than at public schools without uniforms. When students wear a uniform, their attitude towards school changes, which creates a behavioral change as well,
Here is one example of such a research study.
http://www.uh.edu/news-events/stories/2010articles/April2010/0405SchoolUniforms.php
Yeah, well this study that was jointly conducted by the University of Alabama and the University of Notre Dame suggests the contrary….https://faculty.unlv.edu/sloe/Courses/EPY%20702/Class%20Exercises/Lecture%201%20Materials/Articles/Brunsma%20et%20al.%20(1998).pdf
https://faculty.unlv.edu/sloe/Courses/EPY%20702/Class%20Exercises/Lecture%201%20Materials/Articles/Brunsma%20et%20al.%20(1998).pdf – can’t get the link to register correctly, you may have to cut and paste the url to your browser.
Here is yet another article to the contrary….http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/08/18/more-school-uniforms/2662387/
Welcome to the real world. When you have a job you will discover that most of them have dress codes as well. This article is ridiculous. My kids are more concerned with, and involved in working on REAL ISSUES. Homelessness, poverty, to name a few. Please use your ample energy towards something more worthwhile.
Pasting from a facebook commenter on this article:
http://www.catholic.com/blog/trent-horn/three-fallacies-in-the-%E2%80%9Cdress-code-debates%E2%80%9D
I agree, uniforms will solve the problem. Sean Abel – what kind of gibberish is that? I don’t understand a word of it. What distracted you from learning?
When morale is at an all time low, good luck finding employee’s who will care to ‘enforce’ more nonsense in their day.
Morals? Really? How’s about common sense. How about you being a responsible parent and teaching your children to dress right… It’s not the schools responsibility to be your child’s personal nanny. They are there to provide an education.
Because kids have never changed once the parents left for work or after they got in their friend’s car. The school should be enforcing the dress code just as much as parents should be responsible for ensuring their children’s closets are full of acceptable clothing.
If your child is changing cloths once they get to school then maybe you as the parent need to be a little more observant as to what they are leaving the house with. Stop passing the blame on someone else.
HCPS:
Please solve this problem by instituting a uniform policy. As a parent, it would solve may issues. Such as deciding what to wear in the morning, School clothes shopping, distractions in the classroom both by boys and girls. And yes even some teachers!
Children are there to learn. This isn’t a fashion show or the socialization hour!
And what is this nonsense about the rape culture? With over 20 years in law-enforcement I have never seen a rape case that was the result of the clothing the victim was wearing! To this girl, beaches must be nothing more than an orgy infested breeding ground!
What is rape culture? Really? Do they not have newspapers, magazines, or television news programs in Harford County? Or any informative part of the internet?
Here’s a suggestion… if you don’t understand something, look it up, and try to learn. Don’t just spout off about your ignorance like you’re proud of it–or pretend like something isn’t real just because you’ve never heard of it.
Here… I’ll help you out. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_culture
That was difficult, wasn’t it?
Dear BMore, I don’t think Khan was asking to be informed about “rape culture” I think he or she is making the point that it is an over exaggeration being used by the author of the original post because she has so very little to stand on other than her sense of victimhood.
Wow, someone has reading comprehension issues.
“While being told to change, a variety of comments was said that made this young girl cry, like many others like her, instead of letting them focus on their studies.
“I do not think any comments stated about girl’s clothing choice is intentionally said to destroy her, it is just a misunderstanding.”
The above samples from the text are reflective of the kind of writing skills that we can expect from a soon to graduate senior. Unfortunately, this product is better than most that I have read.
I imagine that a lot of thought and effort was put into this as she intended it for a fairly wide audience. And yet it is awkward and rambling. I’m sure some educator would give her an A for effort and add a plus to it for her choice of a politically correct topic. Are the schools now promoting community organization in place of the 3 Rs?
Here’s my advice for Ms. Brett. Find a cause that is truly inspiring rather than just self indulgent. Perhaps local homelessness, hunger, moral decline, or vulgarity in the public square will put your energies to good use. If these fall to appeal then I’m sure you can come up with something.
PS Wouldn’t it be ironic if the fruit of your effort was to inspire a school uniform movement? I detect the start of it in these comments.
This is so awful. GOOD if the schools are promoting community organization! We need some around here! I cannot count the number of sexist, racist, sizeist, and other generally offensive comments I heard when I was in school that just didn’t get addressed or worse, were actually JUSTIFIED.
As for her “cause,” I’d say feminism and sticking up for her fellow students is more than inspiring, it’s heroic. In a place as backwards as Harford County, it takes some serious guts to submit an OpEd like this. In fact, she is taking on one of the causes you mentioned– the lack of respect for females in the school system is a HUGE example of moral decline.
Her grammar and writing skills are better than MOST of these commenters who have been through 12 years of grade school education, and even if it isn’t completely perfect, she has a brilliant and open-minded motivation to speak, and that is enough to earn my respect. She’s taking social action and trying to make a change, and that’s the important thing, right? Progress? Or would you rather live in a society where we all just nod our heads and bow down to authority at every opportunity?
So Former, I take it you don’t appreciate my point of view. Let’s take a look at your comments and see if they hold up.
You begin by applauding the role that schools play in promoting social activism. But whose social activism? I would guess the you and I have different ideas about the values that schools should promote. So who gets to win the indoctrination game? In the end, it should be parents who have the final say over the moral upbringing of their children. If the government schools are in conflict with that then they should stay out of the indoctrination/social engineering game. This does not extend to a dress code which is up to school officials and should reflect a professional and not popular attitude toward dress. I suspect that the overwhelming majority of parents support a modest dress code.
I’m sorry you were subjected to sexist, racist, sizeist?, and other generally offensive comments. It has been my experience that folks who are looking to be offended will invariably find a way to achieve that end. I think that you and Ms. Brett fall into that category. Perpetual victimhood has become a popular pastime among the most thin skinned and entitled of our population.
Now, you seem to think that Mr. Brett’s advocacy of feminism is a worthy cause. Would this be the Christina Hoff-Sommers/Phyllis Schlafly, or the Gloria Steinem/Betty Friedan brand of feminism? The former is interested in true empowerment of woman and their inclusion in a society that honors men, women, children and cultural norms. The latter is more interested in a political movement that advances one gender at the expense of another, leaving all the players confused and marginalized. Victimhood is used to advance the cause and everybody loses. I suspect that Ms. Brett is traveling the victimhood route and that you are happy to join her on that trail. Her reference to “rape culture” sounds hysterical. I think she’s been listening to too many “war on women” speeches.
You claim that Harford County is a backwards society. I’m not sure what you mean by that. It is a suburban community that reflects the values of the majority of people that live here. That is why people bring their families to this area. If the environment does not suit you, consider Baltimore City, Washington DC, or even San Francisco. I lived in Boston during my post college days and found it much to my liking.
And you’re right. It does take some courage to post an opinion on this site. The fact that Ms. Brett is still a child does not shield her from scrutiny. If she goes public then she is fair game. The author of the piece is not able to claim anonymity as the rest of us are. Just the rules of the game, dear. We all play by them.
You claim that she is addressing a lack of respect for girls in HCPS. Can you provide any evidence for this lack? The fact that there is a dress code doesn’t count. Ms. Brett failed miserably in making her point on that count and was very thin in everything but emotion and anecdotes.
You seem to think that the fact that she’s taking up this issue is reason enough for her to earn my respect. Her actions are leading us toward “progress” but the goal of that progress remains unclear. If it is for school children to appear in classroom in any attire that suits their fancy then I disagree with your definition of progress. No, I do not expect people to follow authority as though they were sheep. However, all of us must submit to authority, whether it is at school, in the workplace, the home, or in our spiritual lives. Get used to it. Children especially are expected to submit to and respect authority. Even at the ripe old age of 16 or 17.
As for the overall quality of her piece. Well, as you said yourself, it is better than most. More the pity. That a graduating senior uses such a poorly crafted text as a submission for her college application essay says a great deal about our schools and the mediocrity of their graduates. This is a topic for another posting but I hope that HCPS officials are paying attention.
As to the author’s initial claim that the dress code needs to be reformed. In what way? Who gets to decide on appropriateness? I would not leave it up to the school children: boys or girls. I have been disgusted by the gangsta style of dress I see on young men that would encourage others to see them as hoodlums or outlaws. Why would anyone want to give that impression? The girls are much worse. I have often worried that the prostitutes are left with very little fashion choice once the middle-schoolers have set the pace.
In closing, let me say that this argument is nothing new. I remember fighting with my parents over mini-skirts and go-go boots. That was the over the top fashion of the day. My parents won.
LOL that you think Christina Hoff-Sommers and Phyllis Schlafly are feminists.
Yes I do. Phyllis Schlafly in particular! A great woman and feminist.
Wow, Indoctrination complete. Phyllis Schlafly is a propagandist and anti-feminist. I guess in your world green is blue.
Sweatpea, Would you care to back up your statement with some facts about the woman?
“Heroic”??? Are you serious? Heroic is taking a bullet for someone, or smuggling refugees from certain death. You have the nerve to apply the title of hero of the high school equivolent of a bored soccer mom? My head is going to explode…
“The above samples from the text are reflective of the kind of writing skills that we can expect from a soon to graduate senior.”
If you’re going to criticize the writing style of a student’s op-ed, at least properly critique your own comment. Your comment isn’t exactly the spitting image of grammatical perfection either.
I was not criticizing her style. I was commenting on the overall quality of her text. A side issue to be sure but we are talking about school matters so I felt it was worth mentioning. In fact, others noted the confusing nature of her commentary. Nonetheless, I agree that all writing gets better with repeat editing, but who has time for that when you’re just trying to make a few points. Thanks for your helpful constructive criticism.
How about parents actually parent and instill good morals and values in their children. Girls and boys alike should have enough respect for themselves to want to show a well put together image…
Trends don’t have to be followed because they are just that a “trend.” Put together your own “classy” self-image and walk proudly and your peers will follow. Girls…act like young ladies, if you don’t want guys to look at you inappropriately then stop dressing inappropriately; this is school which is meant for education not an underage night club or hook up spot.
As for the parents/moms of boys, teach them some etiquette and decorum, they don’t need to leave the house looking like a hood-rat.
Well, its getting cold outside now. How many kids are we going to see wearing t shirts and shorts?
The small minority of people who care about the dress code are no concern. If it does become concern, the school will just ban certain clothing. That’s how they work, ban stuff.
Hey its a free country and you are free to go to school somewhere else.
Agreed….
And as for the educators, if there are policies that you are supposed to follow as part of your employment…THEN FOLLOW THEM. If the paperwork is too much to handle and causes you to look the other way then employ a team of people whose job it is to walk the halls between classes and patrol for the violators. Send them to the office and have one person deal with the dress code, class disruptors and other disciplinary issues that need to be dealt with in a given day…so that the children that are actually attending school to LEARN have a chance.
When I was in school, an assistant principal stood at the main door and watched as everyone walked in from the parking lot. If she thought you were in violation, she made you line up against the wall with all the other violators and then marched everyone into the office once the hallway crowd died down for length measurement, offensive determination, and phone calls home. Plus, by the time the office staff was done you were considered late to your first period class and risked detention or extra work.
Surprisingly enough, the line against the wall died down after the first few weeks of school when students figured out they weren’t getting away with violating the rules.
If you want your kids to wear a uniform in school, send them to private or military school. However, I don’t see much positive in instituting a uniform policy in a public school, unless you’re trying to instill a socialistic atmosphere in todays youth. Furthermore, you are installing an additional expense on the parents by requiring them to buy clothing of a certain color and type, that will not be worn by most students outside of the school. Do you really think those same kids won’t want to wear clothing that they see on TV or at the mall? I think you guys are trying to control just a little too much…..
Really? The author of this letter has a lot to learn about the real world. I would love to see you protest the dress code at your place of employment one day. I think you have picked a poor topic to try to get the attention you are seeking. You certainly do not have a full and complete understanding of what you are protesting either. I am sorry that you have been called a “slut” and other things. That is certainly not my take on your stance. However, I think you should try to advocate something that is really worth advocating. How about getting out there and really trying to make a difference in this world? As for the HCPS dress code, rules are rules. If the rule is no spaghetti straps, then no spaghetti straps. If the rule is no texting while driving, then no texting while driving. The problem with this young lady and many other teens today is that they do not feel the rules apply to them.
I’m sorry, but rather than the school playing the role of fashion monitor, why not let them focus on providing a solid education so your children can obtain employment and you focus on taking over parental duties like making they are dressed properly. My sister and I never knew what was included in our dress code for school. Then again we never got sent home for violations bc my mother made sure that we where appropriately dressed.
“Instead of teaching boys to not be distracted by a girl’s body, this code seems to suggest that girls instead should cover up.”
This poor child has been so indocrinated, so twisted by a culture that wants young girls to dress as hookers and then act as victims when (not if) boys/men look and or heaven forbid act on a biologically important and natural instinct. Get a grip girl and examine the real reasons you and your cohorts want to go to school half naked – why you think the educational experience need resemble an episode of the Khardashians before you condemn perfectly reasonable rules designed to save you from yourselves until you arrive as an adult hopefully able to think for yourselves rather than be manipulated by marketers. What an irony that in the age of feminism or what is described as post-feminist women (girls) are more sexualized than ever before and for the most part participate willingly and with glee. If you don’t want to be treated like a sexual object (which you will be regardless of what you wear because you are a woman), at the very minimum put some clothes on or try to dress with enough modesty that you allow boys to take you somewhat seriously.
You have literally just compared sexual harassment and assault to a “biologically important and natural instinct.” I hope you don’t have daughters. Ever.
Good lord please move to Berkeley, CA where knee jerk nonsense is expected and encouraged. This is about self-respect and not making a spectacle of yourself. A 16 year old boy is a giant hormone with legs. 99.9% of them are decent kids who would never treat anyone badly but they have eyeballs. Wouldn’t it make more sense to do everyone a favor and tone it down? I find it amusing your attempt to turn this into a feminist issue (hope you don’t have daughters, blah, blah,). It does indeed turn feminism on it’s head (even logic on it’s head) to argue the right to dress like you want sexual attention but that same sexual attention makes you uncomfortable. No indeed you can’t make this stuff up.
Pardon my colloquialism. But bro, do you even feminism? Feminism is not about working within a system. Feminism is about treating people with equality and respect. Boys are no more “a giant hormone with legs” than girls are at the age of 16. And the implication that young women concerned about the language of the dress code are arguing for the right to turn themselves into sexual objects is disgusting.
So you think it’s perfectly ok for a guy to mistreat a girl? Her dress is no excuse for your sons poor behavior.
Heaven forbid that our young “ladies” maintain themselves with a little bit of self-respect and dignity.
So start by teaching it to them when they are young. Also teach your sons to be respectful and stop making excuses for them. If it’s to much, then perhaps you should rethink parenting.
Public funded, local .gov ran school system with rules and regulations. Don’t like it? Get a diploma from another Maryland accredited school.
Wow, this young lady has gone through proper channels and means to bring attention to something that she feels strongly about. The author mentions multiple times that she does indeed believe in having a dress code, but that it should be updated and enforced equally. I feel the MAIN point of her cause is to bring awareness to the negativity and utterly disgusting behaviors that are perpetrated upon our young females, mostly due to age-old stereotypes which are only confirmed by a large number of commentators on this thread. Yes, there should be a dress code. No, you nor anyone else do not have a moral right to call anyone a slut, skank, whore, prostitute, etc., simply because of the way she dresses. Yep, I’m a firm believer in the First Amendment, what I’m saying is that this comes with a responsibility to open your collective minds, look at the heart of what this young lady is saying before you start typing some slack-jawed, mouth-breather nonsense about being a prostitute, etc., etc.
44 year old father of 4, three girls and one boy. Harford County Native, children go to HCPS and so did I. Independent thinker and voter, raised by a single mother, respect my wife, mother, all working women – including stay-at-home moms (equal props to fathers who stay involved in their children’s lives too).
Please open your minds a little bit, some of you come off sounding like straight cult members.
Props to the young lady, keep fighting the good fight, stay with your beliefs, keep using the proper channels. You are going to go far in life, no matter what HCPS does or doesn’t do with the dress code!
Standing Ovation!!! Someone with reading comprehension skills and a man that understands the issues brought forth. Thank you. This country needs more men and fathers, like you, that get it. You are already setting the example that is needed to teach our young boys, grown men and women enablers of all ages by speaking out. Bravo!
Native, I agree. It is never right to name call and use hurtful language. Our “let it all hang out”, ” I gotta be me” society tends to forget that a bit of restraint goes a long way. Not every opinion needs to be aired. I would apply this standard to myself as it is easy to forget it.
However, if a young woman dresses like a prostitute, or a young man dresses like a thug, they are sending a message about themselves to the world. If the world draws the appropriate conclusion please don’t think any less of it.
Wow zero to sixty. There is no gray area. No one said anything about dressing like a prostitute. Perhaps you ought to examine your thoughts and why your mind goes directly to the lowest common denominator.
I’m sorry, but I have a hard time understanding this article. Somebody needs to pay more attention to their writing, instead of something else.
Quote from Article
“These rules can be found in page 22 of the Bel Air High School Student planner under “Personal Responsibilities” and “Dress”, so let’s cut to the chase. Why do we need such dress code regulations? Maybe it’s because we want our students to project an image of respectfulness and excellence. In that case, sweatpants and pajamas are just as detrimental to this image. Why don’t we create rules against informal clothing?”
If she read further…..she would see PJ’s at school is also against the rules!!!!
No one is going to want to break the dress code in the winter…
I have a dress code in my own home; my children (1 son, a 2012 Bel Air Grad & 1 daughter, a soon-to-be 2015 Grad of North Harford) knew what my rules were/are. My daughter knows that leggings, yoga pants, or written words across her butt “like JUICY” aren’t appropriate to wear, because her mother deems them as revealing and inappropriate and she respects my rules. My son knew that lowering your pants so that your underwear hangs out the back weren’t appropriate so he didn’t wear such items. I take my children clothes shopping as my mother did with me. We made it a point to have discussions about self-respect and dignity…which are conversations that every family/parent should have with their children. Yes, children will be children but if you actually parent and teach your children right from wrong; things like carrying yourself with respect and dignity even when no one is watching and having integrity and being true to yourself is what is important in life, not drawing attention to yourself with the revealing clothes you wear or the nasty words that come out of your mouth or the hundreds of Facebook and Instagram photos that your children post (mostly girls) with their boobs pouring out of their shirts and spending hours getting the best angle so that they look bigger in the pic. If they spent half that time doing something productive…think how much better this world and our future would be.
You must have missed the post-modern thesis she presented… you can do all those things and still walk around naked – and expect to be taken seriously. I swear you can’t make this up.
Was your post directed at me?
Your post… I support you and your post 110%… sarcasm does not always convey nicely on this forum… I should not have used it, but it was an opportunity I could not pass up.
I wonder how much trouble I would get into today if I walked down the street in my 1970s shorts. I do remember when Bel Air High School implemented a dress code in the 1970s, banning t-shirts with beer logos on them. Jim Phillips got a special waiver since his entire wardrobe consisted only of beer t-shirts. Of course, once the waiver was given the code became meaningless and ol’ Mr. Skarzenski had to retract the code. I applaud this young woman’s efforts. People should wear whatever they want, no matter how ridiculous they look.
I am, frankly, appalled by the responses to this article from so many men and women claiming to be parents. You want to talk about opening a dialogue? Maybe try asking some questions, write a response op-ed, or talk to you kids. Talk to other parents. What everyone here should stop doing is shooting their disgust and self-righteousness at a high-school student. This young woman is taking a stand for something she believes in, and does not deserve to be shot down, told to learn about your personal conceptualization of the “real world,” or in any way chastised for her bravery and strength. I know this young woman. She doesn’t dress like a “hooker” or, what was it? “Route 40 stripper”? The examples she cites regard other young women who dress a far cry better than most of their classmates. Gracie Brett has not been “indoctrinated” by a hyper-sexualized culture. Your judgement is the product of said culture. She is not arguing the right to show off or parade her body. She is, in fact, arguing against the sexualization of young girls and women. High school students spend seven hours a day, at the minimum, being subject to the the rules and regulations set forth for them by administration. I am not saying that most of these aren’t for their own good. But the language of the dress code, as set forth in the student handbook, is undeniably sex-specific and geared towards enforcing modest dress and presentation for female students over any other sort of objectionable or offensive presentation. It’s not about professionalism. And it is unfair to compare a mandated school dress code to the dress code one might encounter in a professional context. If one doesn’t like the way one is compelled to dress in a professional context, one can find another job. These young people have no choice. Even so, Gracie Brett has had the courage and fortitude, the creativity and powers of organization, to stand up in a peaceful, non-disruptive way for what she believes in. Regardless of what you may think about her politics or writing style, (I will add that a criticism of her prose is a cheap blow.) she deserves respect. In any case, she at least attached her name to what she’s written. Which is more than I can say for most of the commenters on this thread.
I never said anything bad about her other than to suggest she’s terribly misguided and she is. Anybody regardless of age who thinks they should be free to wear whatever they want regardless of how skimpy or revealing and that males should be trained not to look are beyond foolish because it won’t happen. When your trying to maximize learning and since we know boys will always ogle girls wouldn’t it make sense to just have the girls dress more modestly. You cannot deny biology. My point is our culture is truly messed up – you cannot hyper sexualize everything…present ridiculous role-models who are nothing but mindless trollops, snap to see. Men will always look at women and because they do doesn’t make ours a “rape” culture. It’s also ridiculous to suggest inequal treatment because the dress code zeros in on restrictions above the waste that she seems to think single out the girls. Of course they do…it’s the girls that have breasts. Duh.
Debating with annonymous people on the internet is like winning nothing.
We don’t know if a “real name” is someone’s, well, urhm, ‘real name’ or not.
You still took the time to waste worthless minutes writing your wall of text no one (really) cares about.
You’re talking back too, brother.
Yes I am. And, so? You win. Congratulations.
LOL
So instead of engaging in meaningful discourse, you’re going to turn this into a flame-war? Very mature. This is an open forum, not a pissing contest.
Flame war? What’s your complex? I said you win. You are the big winner.
Welcome to the internet. Meaningful discourse and the internet don’t go together.
Anything else you like to tell me when to do? Feel free to hit reply again, I really care!
Many of you are missing the point of this article completely. She is not saying that young adults should not learn to dress for the “real world” and understand professionalism, instead the underlying messages that the current dress code is sending to your daughters in school. Why is it not possible to teach boys to respect women instead of blaming the girls for dressing inappropriately. Everyone is attacking parents that have not taught their daughters to dress conservatively but what about the boys who have not learned basic respect or self control? It should not be a woman’s fault to censor herself around men so that they are not aroused by her dress. While it is a public school and there are certain dress code policies I think many people would agree with- it is important to examine why these policies are in place and the subconscious messages they are sending to young women everywhere.
Girls dress like hookers specifically to get the attention of boys. The only people who don’t understand this where the fat girls who complain about not having a boyfriend.
You can’t stop a dog from chasing a car it cannot catch or dive, anymore than you can stop a high school boy from chasing scantily clad little girls screaming for attention and love they don’t get at home.
Make them all wear extra large black sweat suits to school. There is absolutely no downside.
Wow. Extremely sexist, bigoted, and irresponsible commentary. Wow.
1.) Girls are human beings, and they can dress for whoever they would like to dress for. That being said, being a female who has lived through her teenage years myself, boys are NOT why most of us put makeup on in the morning, or why we choose what shirt we’re going to put on. If anything, we dress to impress each other, and while that is a sad part of society and a discussion that needs to be had about why women are always pitted against each other, this is definitely a discussion for another day. Endpoint: girls do not only dress for boys. MOST girls don’t dress for boys at all. There are things that are far more important to teenage girls, believe it or not.
2.) Having said this, I am not “fat,” (I actually weigh about 120 lbs and am considered underweight for my height) and I’ve been in a happy relationship since my sophomore year of high school. So that part of your theory’s dis-proven, too.
3.) Good thing men aren’t dogs, so you CAN say, “hey, don’t objectify women like that! they’re people too and you’re being a huge jerkwad if you think she exists only to please your sexual desires! stop chasing after girls, LEARN TO RESPECT THE WORD NO, and get back to your studies!”
4.) You have no right to make assumptions about anyone’s home life. Please stop making those judgments. That is not okay.
I would encourage you to read up a little bit on sex culture and maybe look at a woman as your equal for once instead of treating all of us like inferior creatures who exist only to make you feel big.
Otherwise, please stop.
I’d be more than happy to look at you as an equal. Put on a suit, take off your make up stop dying your hair and drop the drama.
Apparently you can’t because you are trying to impress your girlfriends…….
Sounds legit.
Personally I dress to make myself feel confident about who I am, and never for a man. I wear make up because believe it or not, make up is an art form and I enjoy it. Honestly you will never understand this concept so don’t you dare go and try to tell me about something I experience every day and you have never expreienced.
News flash former student if you are putting on make up and dressing for other girls in your class you are gay and this entire article does not concern you.
Grow up.
I love the randomness of reality shown in the comments.
As a former part of the system I agree that some form of uniform would totally solve this debacle.
Uniforms would be cheaper for the parents as the system could provide clothing at wholesale instead of retail. They could even vote on name brand clothing to accomodate those who are hung up on a name onvthier tags.
There was a lit to digest and sort through. A few things come to mind worth replying to.
School is about learning so clothing should be toned down and appropriate to the task or activity. Would you go on a 2 week backpacking trip wearing stiletto heels because hiking boots make ur feet look big? No way it is impractical. Just like going to the pool in the summer in a down north face jacket and a beanie and sweating ur azz off just cause u think it looks cool? Schools are function over fashion between 7 and 2 period.
Someone mentioned black sweatsuits as a uniform. Not a bad idea except yhat dress is used by a certain gang as initiation uniforms for pledges and seen in some of the rt 40 schools so it could spark unwanted trouble.
Administrators doing rounds is a solution in theory bit in reality when it gets overwhelming for them…aka they have 10 kids in their office for dress code and 10 others for other issues the school leaders often will ignore the dress code violations or warn and not follow up to see the change because they feel they dont have all day to deal with small things and often send them back to class unresolved and uncorrected. Even though they make $100,000 plis a year to deal with what many pass off.
Again a tighter dress code or slack uniform policy would solve thos rediculous issue that shouldnt be an issue. Parents should parent what their kids are wearing and set them up for success not failure and ridicule.
For boys it seems to be shirts with enuendo sayings like the classic big peckers bar and grill or gun, drugs, violent music, or blatently obscene shirts that get them in trouble. Again a lot seems to slip by if the administrator doesnt understand the secret meaning assocition…
Treat school like aplace of employment and not the club or beach or wherever ypu need to look skimpy in order to be accepted.
The variance in replies reminds me of an old fact that was shared on south park concerning 1 in 4 americans.
The author gets respect for standing up for what she believes but I do not think she chose the nest arena for this battle…maybe fight for less dress code at extra cirricular events.
A few things actually: the girl kept using the term ‘bandeau’ – It’s a strapless bra! LOL While I believe girls and boys should be treated equally (boys should be made to pull up their pants etc.) They are there to LEARN – not put their bodies on display. She should focus her energy elsewhere. Actually when reading this all I kept thinking was -first-world problems. The tone was of a spoiled brat using a medium to whine about wanting to wear what ‘girls’ want to wear. She was upset because her friend was called out of the classroom for wearing a see-through shirt with the strapless bra… that’s not appropriate clothing to wear to school – that’s my opinion anyway. If this CHILD came to me I would ask her if she wanted some cheese with her whine. Another, where are the parents? I know children will be children and could easily sneak their clothes out or buy these inappropriate clothing without their knowledge. Are today’s parents still teaching about self-respect and preservation? Another, the article throws around the word rape a ridiculous amount of times. When a male is raped they aren’t asked what they were wearing. She also states that you can’t teach not to rape and I don’t believe that either. I get it, girls feel like they are being punished for the behavior and reactions that result in their bodies. Again, where are the adults teaching the boys about respecting women? It’s been a hot-topic for a long time. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “she asked for it” when a women was sexually assaulted and that makes me sick. Men still get away with objectifying women; hence, adultery is against the law but not punishable (that goes for both sexes actually). Either way – respect has been lost in part because it isn’t being taught. I wouldn’t let my children go to school in a see-through shirt and a strapless bra (I don’t even care if it was semi-see through) – as I wouldn’t let my son go to school with a Big Johnson’s shirt either. Schools have a dress code for a reason and I can understand if the school district enforces uniforms especially if the children decide to protest in any spectrum (they have a right to voice their concerns etc., but let’s remember they’re not yet legal adults). I do agree as well that Cheering uniforms and such push those boundaries (and they’re allowed to wear them in school during school hours on day of games etc.). I can understand they think they should be able to wear what they want, It is a ‘free’ nation… however, rules and policies have to be followed as well. Then you can get into a debate about this as well: why is it when someone doesn’t like a rule etc. they feel that it should be changed to meet their needs? Not to be too harsh – but, if the writer of this article (and other students) don’t agree with the rules there are other alternatives… such as home schooling… then again, they wouldn’t want to go that route because then no one would see their fabulous fashion statements -right? I get it, teenage angst. I guess it’s the psychology major coming out in me but, I would want to ask these children why they feel that they have to display their bodies in such a way as well. Like I said before – they’re there to LEARN – not for their fashion statements. There are schools they can attend if they prefer to go the fashion route. 🙂
I think an opinion has equal ground regardless of age. Do not undermine the young. Students attend school everyday, they are coming from a perspective of direct involvement. Though the issue is not extremely close to me, I will not have Gracie’s character attacked. It is clear you do not know this young woman. It would serve you well to know that she wears cardigans almost everyday, and she happens to be a very caring and active student. She is exercising the idea of freedom of speech–the very same right that is being utilized in this forum to voice uninformed opinions. She is a student directly affected by the rules implemented by the school, an institution of which she is a part of everyday. I would be frightened if she didn’t speak up over rules that she had a problem with. Do not undermine her concerns as a “Whine”. We are all shouting into the void of this web page as if our opinions are worth two bits. Regardless of what you believe about the current dress code, this women is challenging an age old concept. Girls are not sluts, and boys are not drooling dogs. Each individual has control over their body and how they present themselves. It is ignorant to think she advocates for casual Fridays to turn into a lingerie parade, she just believes that our dress code is a bit too strict. This does not make her a “Route 40 Stripper”, a spoiled brat, or an immoral person. She is a concerned student, which is a lot more than the average kid can say. This is not the only issue she is adamant about. And whether I agree with her or not, I have never met a young woman more in tune with politics. So, to all of the anonymous haters and quick-to-judge parents, please lead by example and stop tearing this girl’s character limb from limb. I am neither here to attack or defend the dress code. But I am here to say that this young woman deserves more respect than she is being shown. At the end of the day, our arguments are the same. We want respect, either from the school n enforcing a dress code or through student’s self expression. We want society’s respect. So why all of this bashing? As for you Gracie–Give em’ hell girl.
Although I may not necessarily agree with some of the restrictions of the dress code, however it is appropriate. School is a place where you receive an education, even though high school may not be as professional but the way you carry yourself and your image is extremely vital in life. You must know when and when not to do something. If you go to any university you are dress inappropriately the professor will kick you off or may not even let you in the classroom. Yes it is important to express yourself and we do so by our styles however you must in the right manner. When you go in for a job interview you’re not gonna wear a club dress, right now school is your job so it goes hand and hand. Think about it. Expand your thinking.
And I am a college student writing this so i understand but it comes down to wrong and right.
I’m not against a dress code if schools can come up with a good reason behind it, and if the excuse that “male instructors and students will be distracted by revealing clothing” is done away with forever. This statement is incredibly sexist and pushes the objectification of young women, telling males that it’s not their fault if they sexualize a girl at school. Further, it makes males look like incompetent creatures who are unable to control themselves, which is not only disrespectful to men but also pushes the blame on the young girls and the victims of any sexual crimes that have ever happened in the school system.
Rules about tight clothing can easily turn into fat shaming, which is also a HUGE problem with students as it is without teachers and the rest of the school system joining in, too.
If we’re going to have rules, they need to be fairly written, fairly enforced, and with a decent, non-sexist, non-sizeist reason.
There’s a Lane Bryant in the Harford Mall.
Some people just refuse to admit they’re plus-sized, when if they dressed to compliment their body shape instead of squeezing into something popular using a shoehorn and a pound of Crisco, they wouldn’t be made fun of.
Alumni and Emma – you get it! Good for you too Native. As a son and brother to seven sisters, respect for women as persons was expected of me from day one. As a young man, I never understood the mistreatment or abasement of young girls or women. However, I never had the courage to challenge my peers, thinking that I am responsible only for my actions. Now as a husband and father to a teenage girl, I have learned that I have a responsibility to actively defend against the status-quo that marginalizes women.
It is never too late to make an effort to fully understand a position that is foreign to your current point of view. I encourage all those who clearly do not understand the point of Gracie’s article to try to understand that a society that places too much emphasis on dress code and ignores teaching boys (and girls) about respect needs a correction. This approach is too much medicine and not enough diagnosis and treatment of the root cause of a condition.
Gracie – I am inspired by your courage and am certain that you are not motivated by attention-seeking, but only by bringing to light an issue that needs to be examined. I am also encouraged by the young men I know who have a greater appreciation for feminism than I did at their age. Be brave and vocal about what is right!
I believe that the dress code should be reformed, and equally enforced. It is way to often I walk down the hallway and see a guy wearing a tee short with a scantly clad girl on the front of it, which I find down right offensive towards women. These boys rarely get in any sort of trouble for wearing these inappropriate shirts. I also hate how people say that teenage girls are wearing slutty clothing and our parents don’t know what we wear because I have my mother is strict on what I wear and still will allow me to wear clothing that does not meet this dress code. This dress code is ridiculous because according to the hcps dress code my j.crew 5 in chinos do not meet the dress code. If you’re familiar you would know that theses shorts are not slutty or tasteless in any way and are something many people wear to work or for golfing. Also I think that it is horrible that our administration has made it clear that all girls in violation of the dress code would be sent home and that eligibility for sport, clubs and parking would be put at risk for such a minor infraction; the admins use scare tactics to get students to follow rules instead of having an open conversation about why the rules are in place.
Just because they’re J Crew doesn’t make up for the fact that 5″ shorts barely get down to mid-thigh on most high school students.
The rule is clear, shorts for both sexes must reach within a set distance of the knee.
I graduated from Bel Air High School, and the first week of my freshman year I got in trouble for a hole that was about 2 inches above my knee…
*on a pair of jeans
Jill, Why were you attending school in tattered clothes? As it happens, that was the height of fashion when I was a high school student. We felt that we were sticking it to the man by showing up in shredded jeans and torn T-shirts. Not me because my mother wouldn’t let me out of the house in the way that I really wanted to dress. I despised her for it but am only too happy to mimic her example now that I have reached the age of reason.
Show up at your place of employment looking like a hobo and see what happens. That is unless you aspire to a career in ink or body piercing.
???
Just because I wore a pair of jeans with ONE hole in them to school once does not mean I don’t know how to dress appropriately for a “place of employment”.
Jill, Show up at work once in inappropriate attire and you will be counseled.
And told to either run to the store and return dressed appropriately, or take the rest of the day off.
I haven been in Bel Air High and I’ve seen the way some of the students dress WITH a dress code in place. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what it would be without one. I send my children to school for one purpose and one purpose only and that is to get an education. She should not have to be subjected to butt checks and cleavage in order to get that education! By what the article states, why not just go to school naked and taunt every member of the opposite sex? I honestly hope that this article puts school uniforms on the forefront of the agenda for next year so that issues and distractions like this can no longer be in place. If everyone is required to wear the exact same thing, short shorts and cleavage will be a think of the past!
Even more then that, I wonder where young girls are even getting the clothing that they wear. I certainly hope their parents are not approving of the things they try to get away with! Your body is your temple and should be respected. How can someone respect your body when you yourself fail tk respect it and flaunt it to anyone who happens to look your way and then cry a river when you get attention for what you wear? Wasn’t that why you choose that outfit to start with? I certainly can not see someone picking out a dress that looks like it is Something that would better fit my 4 year old and saying, I think this is a good career dress, so what besides attention from the opposite sex is it that you’re looking for when you dress in a provocative manor?
If all of you ignorant individuals have not already noticed, this girl is not the first to be speaking out about a school dress code. Dress code reform has been a hot topic lately all around the U.S. and like it or not- is targeted at girls 99.9% of the time. I would have to guess that everyone writing the nasty comments on here hasn’t been to highschool since the 70-80’s and have absolutely no idea about a school environment these days. I graduated from an HCPS school in 2013, so I am familiar with the current policies and reactions to them. Yes, they are put in place to avoid girls showing up in low cut tank tops and short shorts. But the reason for those things to not be allowed should be that NOBODY wants to see it, not because the BOYS will be distracted. A parent much teach their child respect. For girls, that is self respect which will cause them to think twice about that they wear. For boys however, the key is respect for women. To see the girls around them as a whole, as a good person, as a great friend. Not as a pretty face or a pair of boobs. Us girls do not want to propel a dress code reform because we want to dress like “sluts” (disgusting word that I can’t believe parents are using on a highschool forum), but because we want to feel as though we are able to express our individual style and wear our favorite shirt… Even if it is slightly sheer. Walk into Charlotte Russe in the mall and you will see tons of long sleeved shirts that are high cut, but made with slightly sheer fabric. That is a style these days and girls want to look cute at school without having to be pulled out of class and shamed for an outfit that we think is completely awesome. A HCPS middle school has banned girls from wearing yoga pants and leggings… Ridiculous!!! There is absolutely nothing inappropriate about being completely covered from waist to ankle. So what they are tight? Girls have butts. That is not an unknown fact. If your sons are getting excited and distracted from their work over a completely covered butt then it is you as a parent who has done something wrong- not the girl. Teach your kids respect and there won’t be an issue.
“I would have to guess that everyone writing the nasty comments on here hasn’t been to highschool since the 70-80?s and have absolutely no idea about a school environment these days. ”
Some of us are putting kids on those HCPS buses every day, buying tickets for the bleachers for games, sitting in classrooms for American Education Week, picking our kids up after practice, etc, and we’re disgusted with how some students dress and how little dignity they seem to have, and are worried about how it is affecting our children’s education.
We see Cosmo in the grocery store check out aisles, and notice how Seventeen has become just as bad as that notoriously trashy magazine. We watched Beverly Hills 90210 and channel-surfed past the moral disaster that was the 90210 reboot.
We expect better from our children and believe HCPS should maintain a more wholesome environment that is conducive to learning even if it doesn’t fit with what Hollywood shows our children what high school should be like (according to the mind of a producer looking to sell tickets/advertising rather than depict reality).
Just because you have seen a few bad examples of people disobeying dress code does not mean that every highschool student is a vigilante who wants to parade around in nothing but a bathing suit and a pair of socks. Believe it or not, girls can have self respect and still dress in a way that maybe you do not agree with. Part of having self respect is knowing who you are and being able to show it. Whether through clothing, hair style, music, etc., we are teenagers who are finding ourselves and if I want to wear a tank top that my own MOTHER bought me, then I’ll be damned if I will be told to change because my collarbone is showing. What other students wear really has almost no affect on people. I only graduated 2 years ago and if you ask me to recall any one’s specific outfit, I couldn’t.. Because it’s really not that important. People care about who you are as a person, not how you dress.
“What other students wear really has almost no affect on people.”
You’ve obviously never been a teenage boy.
Sorry that your teenage boy can’t control his boner when he sees a girl’s collarbone or kneecap is showing.
Sorry that your teenage boy can’t control his boner when he sees a girl’s collarbone or kneecap. *
Keep the twins locked away until you get to the beach next summer
I cannot believe the amount of disrespect coming from adults. It seems as though just because this girl is young she is naive however this is not the case. She has faced sexist first hand and is finally doing something about it. As a former HCPS student I can’t relate to this kind of misfortune. It angers me that adults do not take this situation seriously. Young girls are being regarded as objects and no one is doing anything about it. Until now. This is the starting point. This article is the motivation that young girls need. To show that they CAN make a difference and that their opinions will be heard. Just as she said, we should teach boys not to sexualize spaghetti straps and not teach girls that the way they look comes before their education. So thank you for writing this article.
Most adults realize that respect must be earned, it is not conveyed automatically, and they went through the exact same phase when they were younger and know you’re not going to change human nature. Dressing poorly, acting like thugs or whores, posting pictures of parties and drunken debauchery on Instagram/Twitter, etc, are not ways to earn respect, and boys will fantasize about their female classmates while ignoring their teachers.
20+ years ago we were in the author’s shoes, and we know you’re not going to change human nature just by throwing some labels on it and saying it’s wrong.
Does the IT department at HCPS block this site? Who wants to bet there will be a “social” learning session based on this persons passion? LOL
Here’s what I learned:
The ‘personal problem’ groups (a few) are minority voices in a gigantic system voicing their agenda (whatever it is, usually a personal problem), in other words, not important for HCPS.
Disagree with someone, get called a bigot, sexist, intolerant, etc.
Every time a personal problem “controversial” topic shows up, a few people come out of the woodwork just for the comments only on that specific article.
As someone with more than ten years experience teaching high school students, it has been my experience that students who violate a school’s dress code, whether male or female, do so deliberately and with the intention of getting attention. Any attempt to excuse this behavior behind some mislabeled freedom of expression is a diversionary tactic. These students want the attention of other students, pure and simple. Our author, Ms. Brett, has very valid points regarding the objectification of women, but to use them to prop up an argument against the current dress code is misguided at best and damaging to argument against objectification at worst.
Something else that Ms. Brett does not acknowledge is the long established (and court upheld) role of the school “in loco parentis”. It allows the school to act in the best interest of the child regardless of whether the child agrees to it or not. Students have very little rights in the school system. There is no right to privacy, no right to freedom from unreasonable search and seizure, no right to freedom of expression. This has been established in our courts. While this may serve to stifle individual creativity, it serves a greater purpose to establish and maintain a safe and orderly learning environment. To make the argument that school should be like the real world and students should be able to dress as they wish is a fallacy. If school represents the real world for students, then students attending school is analogous to adults going to work, and most jobs have at the very least an unwritten dress code (if not an actual written dress code).
School doesn’t represent the “real world” you speak of (aka just the work world) for students, though Mr. “In loco parentis.” When was the last time students got paid to go to school? Isn’t it the other way around?
So, your argument is that the girl’s sheer blouse and bandeau wasn’t a fashion statement (popular in many colleges and magazines today), but a call for attention? I think that girl would disagree with you immensely. In the “real world” I know of and on college campuses, students wear those clothes.
Also, can’t the author argue for her freedom of expression in the school system? The Supreme Court changes its mind every day. And I hope you will, too.
Well, it’s hard to say with this current Corporate activist Supreme Court that we have now. They’ve been working against “We The People” for quite some time.
To all of the parents out there who just don’t get it:
Rape occurs every day. The person who wrote this isn’t addressing a dress code, but a culture. A culture that, with your avid help and support it seems, believes that it’s fine to think that women shouldn’t be able to wear a halter top, because that’s “disrespectful” or “distracting” to a school body.
Women should be free to wear what they want. In fact, everyone should. Whether you agree with it or not, your child is probably going to wear what she wants in the future. And in college you have no say, parents. I am so sorry to tell you that parties exist and rape exists.
So I truly hope that none of your daughters get raped, sexually harassed or sexually assaulted in college, when they have the freedom to choose what they want to wear. Because then will you still believe that it’s your daughters fault because her skirt was too short? Or her top was too sheer? That the boy was tempted or distracted by your daughters clothing, so it’s okay? Because when boys get the message that they can be “distracted” by girls, they stop taking responsibility.
No matter what girls are wearing, they should be respected. There is an incentive in the work force to wear clothes that cover you up–a salary and a job. There is no incentive for students in school to cover up, so let them choose! Their clothes do not affect their grades and if you think they do, why?? And if you think it affects the male teachers, refer back to my main point.
Confidence is a problem with teens today, parents. A woman should be confident in her body. If she feels more confident in a bandeau and sheer top, then let her wear it. In fact, the more confident a student is the better his or her grades are! So, if you think the way students dress is the problem, bring yourself back to your teenage years where your Afros and parachute pants were probably more “distracting” than your blouse. But I bet you sure felt confident.
109 comments on dress codes ! Really?
Ok seriously girls should not walk around with undergarments showing regardless if they have on a bandeau or not. I’m a senior now at BAHS. If you have on a see through top put on a tank top! You’re gonna get a shock when you go in the work field on certain dress codes that are stricter than school dress code! There is a time in place for what you wear. If you’re out of school wear whatever you want, but while your in school at least wear something appropriate. And I have seen multiple times when a majority of the girls wear the shortest shorts they can in school with a see through top with just a bandeau. And I’m sorry that’s your friends fault if she came to the school and not wearing appropriate clothes. Everyone knows the dress code and it doesn’t matter if their AP students or not the code applies to everyone
With all due respect, I think you (and a lot of these commenters) are missing the point of her article. She is saying that it is not right that these dress codes exist as they do ANYWHERE, it’s just that her school is her current environment. Stricter dress codes “at work” (which is a really vague statement because jobs are different across the board and an increasing number of people have jobs in which they are free to wear whatever they like, or they have a uniform so “undergarments showing” isn’t a thing that can possibly happen) are part of the problem. The system that set these codes in place are shaming girls for wearing clothes that they feel good in because a male teacher or classmate can’t bear to avert his own eyes and focus on what HE is supposed to be doing.
When you say that it is a girl’s fault that a man is sexualizing her, you are not only blaming the girl (the victim of the scenario), but you are also saying that it’s okay to objectify women because “you can’t control your impulses.” If guys really can’t control their impulses then they aren’t really human, are they? That’s what sets us apart from other animals– we can overcome our instincts to act like civilized human beings.
The fashion market nowadays makes it impossible to find well-fitting clothes that do not sexualize a girl’s body. It has been YEARS since I’ve walked into ANY popular store and found shorts that were the appropriate “knee-length” for HCPS guidelines. Most shirts made are low-cut or sheer, and it’s uncomfortable to wear a tank top under every piece of clothing you own.
There is a time and a place to dress, and the time is HIGH SCHOOL. The place is HIGH SCHOOL. Casual dress should be fine, and these are the casual trends nowadays. You’re not in a professional workplace, you’re in a casual environment in which you are asked to do your best to learn as much as you can, and I’ll be damned if students who are trying to strain themselves mentally as much as possible aren’t told they’re allowed to be comfortable while doing so.
It’s sad, because slut shaming is so common among teenagers already, without the help of their school board or parents. When people make a big deal about dress codes like this, it only makes things worse. Support our female students for once, yeah? Maybe some good will come of it.
“The fashion market nowadays makes it impossible to find well-fitting clothes that do not sexualize a girl’s body. It has been YEARS since I’ve walked into ANY popular store and found shorts that were the appropriate “knee-length” for HCPS guidelines.”
And that is where being a parent comes in. In my house, having appropriate clothes for school is much more important than shopping at the popular stores. Sure, there are fights every August when we’re shopping, but I’m the parent, I make the rules regarding their clothing, and I only buy clothes that comply with HCPS dress code.
Sears and Land’s End might not be your idea of high fashion, but they carry clothes that comply.
As a young woman who went to a Harford County High School not too long ago, I believe there should not be a dress code or that the current one should be changed. There is no dress code at the college I go to and everyone dresses modest and honestly like they do not give a shit. And college is a place to get a more prestigious degree than high school so if there is a dress code in high school shouldn’t there be one for college. But there isn’t one and it is not an issue. I remember in high school a bunch of my friends getting in trouble for their clothes. It caused more trouble for them to get punished than for them to wear what they wanted. Girls should be modest but they should learn that in a constructive way, not by getting yelled at and being shamed for what they thought was a nice outfit. As a high school student, I couldn’t have cared less about what other girls wore, if it was too skimpy or if it was sweatpants, or whatever it was. It did not affect my studies and it did not affect me personally. I honestly believe it does not matter at all. There should be a reform of the dress code and it should stop shaming girls and instead empower them to be strong.
College students have learned that rolling into class in PJ pants and a sweatshirt is ok because they’re able to hit the social events later in the evening when they’re dressed to the 9s. High school students do not have those opportunities, so they go all-out during the school day.
“sensitivity training”? you guys are the reason kids win trophies for participation. tell all your little snot kids to wear normal clothes. any girl that wears skimpy clothes in high school is just looking for attention. and any guy that wears something innapropriate is looking for attention too and they should both be disciplined. i don’t wanna hear some crap about how kids are going to “protest”. all you’re doing is causing a big headache for the school administration and many parents. these kids make harco look bad, and if you’re going to protest, make it something worth fighting for, not a fight so you can look cheap.
i’m a guy, and sure we obviously like skimpy clothes on girls. but i’d much rather see a girl look good in grown up manner. we respect girls a lot less when you dress the way you do.
and to all you kids, grow up. i graduated from bel air 3 years ago. go to school, learn, stop trying to be something you’re not and get into a college where you can wear whatever you want. maybe two people around you are going to care about what you did in high school, but you’ll definitely be remembered for being a petty little kid that got all high and mighty and looked stupid because you aren’t allowed to wear your skirt so everyone can see your ass.
THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CONFIDENCE AND GETTING A TROPHY AND EVERYTHING TO DO WITH KEEPING YOUR KIDS FROM GETTING RAPED.
Sensitivity training is for people to understand what racism and sexism really are, and how damaging they can be for a community. It’s EXTREMELY important, as is sex ed that goes past abstinence and “wear a condom.”
When is the last time a rape occurred in an HCPS school?
Rubber necking to get a glimpse of a bra or see an outline of a thong when they should be following the lesson happens every day.
The adults on here have no clue what they’re talking about. I graduated this year from BAHS and the guys are treated much more differently than the girls. One sports team (lacrosse I think?) wore dress-code breaking denim shorts one day and did not get coded as far as I’m aware (correct me if I’m wrong, but I saw them all day). I have seen guys wear shirts that have NAKED women on them, as in full on breasts and butts, as well as profanity and alcohol references. All of this is against the dress code, and yet they wore those shirts all day long. For all of the 4 years that I went there, I have seen one guy get dress coded. Girls are dress coded all of the time. We weren’t even allowed to wear tank tops, yet the guys wore them all of the time. You guys are calling 15 year old girls hookers, sluts, and prostitutes for wearing tank tops and shorts. Think about that. If you think a 15 year old girls SHOULDERS are inherently sexual, then that’s your problem. If you think everyone would show up to school naked if there were no dress code, you have something wrong with you. The majority of students do not break the dress code in the first place. Yes, there should be a dress code to limit what students can wear, but it is not currently applied equally.
Honestly, it’s way more disrupting to class and the students learning to be called down to the office and forced to wear a gym uniform than it is to wear shorts or a sheer top. It’s not going to stop them from wearing those things in the first place. The whole “it’s preparing you for the real world” is bullshit. We KNOW you can’t wear these things to a professional setting. Almost all students get a job or otherwise have first-hand experience in “professional settings” (counting fast food and the like, since it is a job and you have to wear uniforms.) I feel sorry for some of the children of parents on here. You don’t want your kid wearing some styles of clothing, then don’t buy it for them. You can’t control what other parents allow. Keep in mind I’m not talking about actual offending clothing (T-shirts with stuff like “kill all jews” or whatever), I’m talking about tank tops and shorts. But please, tell people to move schools and disrupt their whole life, because if you don’t agree with something or someone, they should change their life so you don’t have to see it, right?
Thank you!
Um yeah you’re saying it’s not societally acceptable for a boy to wear clothing showing his midriff or thighs that’s just as sexist. Your placing societal causes upon them just like how they are for girls. And just as if a boy were wearing short shorts that showed his junk off to every body it’s the same for a girl. It would probably draw the same amount if not more attention. Now save your slutty clothing for after school because it will surely evoke attention from a horny high school boy with raging hormones. It’s not condoning rape culture but a hot girl wearing clothing like that will undoubtedly get the attention if these boys. The rules apply to both sexes only thing is it’s typically only females who wear suggestive clothing like that. I’ve seen boys have to change their tank tops that reveal too much if their chest. Me being one if them. So go and be some bitchy feminist but atleast look at both sides of the argument first
Obviously a few people are butt hurt and keep posting their wall of text replies under different names.
Why not dress like a hoochi mama after school? Actually, when you graduate you have a major portion of your life to do whatever you want.
No dress codes for Liberals, please. That would run counter to our mantra: “anything goes and nobody is responsible for anything.”
You are misguided. I see none of the men, boys and parents of those taking ANY personal responsibility for their behaviors and thoughts here in red Harford County. It’s all out there in the comments section of you can read. So that proves you wrong to anyone with eyes.
so should students be allowed to come to school naked then? Where is the line drawn? This society saying that dressing inappropriately is acceptable everywhere is ridiculous.
Wow, zero to sixty much?
You are misguided. I see none of the men, boys and parents of those taking ANY personal responsibility for their behaviors and thoughts here in red Harford County. It’s all out there in the comments section of you can read. So that proves you wrong to anyone with eyes.
“Red” Harford County and then used as a prejorative? I was unaware that “rape” had a political persuasion. God you are a waste of time.
Misogyny does have a political persuasion and it’s definitely Teapublican, just look at the radical comments. Your God might be a waste of time, mine is not.
Shaming a child bc they wore something the school does not agree with is not an appropriate action that should be taken by the school. That’s was a major point in the article that most of you missed. Personally I believe it is your job as the parent to teach your children how to dress and not the schools. It’s the schools job to provide an education for your child. Take responsibility for you own kid and teach them to be responsible. If that’s to much for you then maybe you should re think the whole parenting thing.
Listen I respect your opinion about the dress code, I am a Parent and a School Worker and at One time I was a student in some of the roughest schools in the country. A dress code is in place to protect lives, In some areas Colors/Logos different styles are not only sterotypical but Will get you killed. In the WORKPLACE dress codes are enforced because of LAWS/ because of discrimination pratices and EEOC compliance. Before you protest something look at the whole picture
Dress codes are strictly enforced in most major corporations because of sexual harassment that does go on. YES in most places provoking someone may be harassment, also Most established businesses want a professional dress code that represents their interests. In a school they must be enforced, and look just be glad that your not wearing uniforms. Be careful what you are saying.
As a former BAHS student and soon to be mother who also works a full time job as a technical analyst in the very male-dominated computer industry, I’m left shaking my head over this article. Honestly, kid, if the extent of all you’ve learned about “female expression” is limited to your clothing choices and you think changing a school dress code is somehow a great moral battle in the war on rape culture and women’s rights, think again. Maybe if you focused less on your dress code (which, btw, is a standard everywhere regardless of whether you graduate and go to another school – you don’t get service in public restaurants if you’re missing pieces of clothing, you don’t get a professional (read: paying) job if you don’t look the part) and more on being an intelligent member of society, you’d realize that the way to prevent rape culture in this society is through education – which is not about whether a girl feels like she has the freedom to dress however she likes, but rather about how she chooses to protect herself when she leaves the house, or what she teaches her future son, or how she chooses to allow men to treat her. Imagine the concept of your brain being a better weapon against rape culture than your clothing! So stop worrying about whether your shoulder is pretty enough and everyone gets to admire it and start worrying about real issues – like whether your brain is strong enough to handle the reality of an adult world.
@formerstudent Worth repeating “Imagine the concept of your brain being a better weapon against rape culture than your clothing!”
Wow somebody totally missed the point of the article. I’m actually amazed you got a job without having reading comprehension. Good Luck missy and work on your reading comprehension!
Has a high school student I do not believe in uniforms. Let’s just make us into little robots that act and look alike. It is quite rude for a girl to be asked to change her clothes i front an entire class where she is humiliated when she shows a shoulder A SHOULDER! Im sorry but when did shoulders become so attractive? How about we teach self control?
That is why dress codes and uniforms are so effective. When the competition for attention is removed the real reason you are in school can be addressed
The fact you find being disciplined for breaking the rules “rude” shows you basic lack of understanding. I’d bet you were the kid who spent the majority of time in a grocery store spinning in circles on the floor screaming while mom ignored you.
This is nonsense. Grow up. This isn’t the mall or a party. It is school. If you got a job and they expected you to dress or not dress in a certain way and to present yourself professionally, then you do it. Not because of some kind of “rape culture” because it not everything in the world has to do with rapes. It is because you aren’t supposed to dress the same way for the club that you dress for school. It is school. To put it another way, is it something you would feel comfortable seeing a 4-year-old kid dressed in? If not, Why? Those are the reasons some clothes don’t have a place in a learning environment. There are “funny” t-shirts with really harsh language that make me laugh but if I saw them on a little kid it would be kind of depressing and make me feel bad for them and wonder about what kind of parents they must have. Those shouldn’t have a place in school either. And not because of some kind of rape culture. It’s just inappropriate.
Out of all the things wrong with the world to pour your energy into, you decide to fight for the right for high school girls to show people their underwear? And there was going to be an organized protest for this for real? I’m almost glad other people get to be the boss of what they wear because high schoolers are apparently some of the most self-centered, petty people imaginable so it serves them right.
The author made it clear that she is not in favor of eliminating the dress code, her cause is to influence reform of the dress code, just maybe that’s not a bad idea, and should be considered…. at the very least considered. I’d like to hear more about what this reform would mean, and what changes she would suggest. This is not a whimsical plot of an uneducated, rebellious nor innappropriately dressing student, but rather a young adult taking a stand on an issue she believes in and has taken time to educate herself about. She has made some very thoughtful efforts to address her issue in appropriate ways through writing articles and contacting school officials. While I do not agree with all of her viewpoints (and have debated many of them this week with my own high school senior), I do respect her for taking a stand in the way she has and for influencing awareness of an issue that is an important one, whether I think it is or not.
The problem is that the line must be drawn somewhere, and the line will be drawn in modesty’s favor whenever there is a question. Tube tops, sheer clothes, bare shoulders, exposed thigh, etc, will never be tolerated because once you allow some of them you will have problems enforcing the rules.
Teachers are not fashion police or schooled in medical anatomy, requiring no visible collar bone or shoulder, legs be covered within X inches of the knee, and no visible undergarments is much easier for everyone, including teachers, parents, and students, to understand than rules like “clothing must be no more than 20% transparent in any area” or “shoulder straps must be wider than 50% the distance from the highest point of the trapezius to the farthest point of the acromion” or “the vastus medialis must not be visible when standing”
As a female graduate student at Towson University, it is refreshing and inspiring to witness young women voicing their opinion. The author makes valid points that do not simply criticize the dress code; but provide suggestions for improvement and reevaluation. Well done.
I didn’t see a single constructive change in the dress code the author would like to see, she just whined that current female fashion is much more likely to violate the dress code than male fashion.
We could make the author happy by simply saying no skin from knee to color and over the shoulders!
Anyone seen the 60’s flix “Wild in the Streets”?
A real life example of the theme of “Wild in the Streets” would be the rise to power of the Khmer Rouge. It is an example of the kind of chaos that can develop when the young and their ideas take hold without the restraint and wisdom of their elders.
I’m impressed
How about this novel idea….UNIFORMS! A great way to establish a standard of dress across the county for male and female students! School colors, conservative, economical, equalizing. There. .problem solved! Now to get the Superintendent on board!!
There’s a huge problem with that idea, at least in Harford County. Kids below the poverty line would probably have to receive subsidized uniforms. That notion alone would drive many taxpayers and commentators on this site into an unfettered rage.
Here’s an idea if you can’t afford to cloth your children don’t have them.
Here is a typical day at an HCPS high school.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=VT0rWtJHxVM
Wally wally wally. Twerk twerk twerk
Misogyny does have a political persuasion and it’s definitely Teapublican, just look at the radical comments. Your God might be a waste of time, mine is not.
Students should be made to wear a unfiform. Problem solved!
Then lets tackle the teacher and administrator dress code. When is it appropriate to wear jeans, flip flops, stretch pants, knee high stripper boots and short skirts in a professional setting? Walk into any school on any given day and you can easily spot these ‘trends’ by our students “role models”…….
These feminist movements are becoming very annoying. Just a bunch of highschool girls who don’t even know what feminism or equality is. No person is actually dressed comfortable by letting all their goods hang out. Don’t try to put the blame on males, you shouldn’t be dressing like a hooker to go to school. Put on normal clothes that cover up and go to school to learn like you’re supposed to. LNT