The following letter Patterson Mill Middle High School Principal Wayne Thibeault was disseminated to parents and posted on the school’s web site:
Dear Parents of Patterson Mill Middle High Students,
The Patterson Mill Middle High School community was saddened to hear of the sudden death of one of our students. The death of any young person is a loss that, in one way or another, affects each of us. The tragic circumstances of a teen death are perhaps more difficult to accept.
We have asked the assistance of the HCPS Crisis Intervention Team to help our school community deal with this loss. We are providing support to all students and staff to help them cope with this tragedy. You may anticipate questions and a need to talk about the death with your child.
As student, parent, and staff, we are struck by a wide range of emotions when confronted with death, particularly one that is so sudden. These emotions are particularly difficult for young people to understand and may trigger many questions. Situations such as these may create a variety of reactions including: sleep disturbances, temporary loss of appetite, and/or anxiety, or fears about his/her personal health and safety. Young people may also use humor to deal with their feelings, and although this may seem odd, it is a common coping strategy. Some suggestions for dealing with any concerns your child may have include:
– Listen to your child and let him/her know you are available to answer any questions
– Encourage your child to express his/her feelings and talk to him/her about your own feelings
– Don’t be afraid to cry in his/her presence and share your own loss experiences
– Talk to your child about your personal beliefs regarding death and loss
If you have any concerns regarding your child’s reactions to this loss, please do not hesitate to call the school for assistance. The following individuals are available to answer questions or meet with your child individually:
Craig Malone, School Counselor
Mary Malone, School Counselor
Terence Hansrote, School Counselor
Kelly Truitt, School Counselor
Jane Russell, School Psychologist
Sincerely,
Wayne Thibeault, Principal
What happened?
We are not quite sure. My son and niece were classmates of his and the rumor mill says that he possible O/D’d or it was a suicide. The kids said he’d been a victim of bullying. A sad thing if true. I know I gave the kids extra hugs tonight.
He committed suicide because of bullying
You have no clue why he did or didn’t commit suicide. Spreading these type of rumors is pointless and destructive. Take your issues with Patterson Mill (there are many) to a different posting.
He suffered a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head. My thoughts and prayers are with the family.
Dear Someone
And you know this how? Even the police report did not list cause of death!!! The kids at PMill need everyone’s support right now not spreading rumors. Oh and Anonymous that has yet to be proven so again keep your opinions on this to yourself till LL the facts are in. William you said it well!!!!
Sorry meant to say ALL the facts in my last post
I am not going to say 100% that he committed suicide because of bullying. But even if that was not the cause, he was bullied. I think this is an important learning experience. Bullying is something that happens everywhere, to people of all ages. That doesn’t mean it won’t affect that person. Love is Louder is a national campaign to stop bullying. Last week, at Towson University there was a Love is Louder week. Everyone was able to share their stories and people committed to stop bullying. It was a great way to hear how bullying affects everyone. Maybe we can find something good to teach our children in this sad, sad time.
My thoughts and prayers are with this family. Whether it was or was not bullying this is a good time to talk to your kids about bullying and the effect it has on some kids.
It was not bullying. My son knew him since they were both in sixth grade. He ate lunch with another of my son’s best friends. He was very depressed since his father passed recently and unexpectedly.
You know it amazes me how some people THINK they know what is going on in a person’s life especially when they don’t know them at all. This is how HORRIBLE RUMORS start!!!! My son was Adam’s best friend since kindergarten and even he does NOT KNOW the true reason of why this happened. It saddens me that everyone immediately goes to the bullying point. Although my son and Adam have been bullied in the past no one knows if this played a part of his death. PLEASE if you want to help then offer your love, prayers and support to Cheryl and the rest of the family at this time. Send a flower, a card, offer a dinner or to run errands. I am sure she can use a TON of support right now. Thank you and PLEASE hug your kids every day!
Agree 100% Tori. Those closest to him may never know the real reason, so quit the rumors. Just pray for the family during this difficult time.
Rumors also start because students are not given the facts from the start, and tragic events such as these are shrouded in mystery. Teachers at PMHS, for example, were told not to mention the student’s name and refer to his death as an “unattended death.” This sort of ambiguity drums up more speculation, when what is needed is more honest and open communciation when students need it most.
I agree 100% with this comment.
By law they are not allowed to reveal the student’s identity to other students.
Additionally, “unattended death” is something of a technical legal term for a death that occurs with no medical personnel, such as doctors or nurses, present. To call the tragedy an unattended death, while sounding vague, is nevertheless accurate. It is beyond regrettable that anyone, especially a child, feels the need for a permanent solution to a temporary problem. My family is too well acquainted with such a situation. In another location on this site it is reported that a note was left in this instance: At least this family has that for some kind of answer, hollow comfort though it may be; my family did not have even that consolation. My prayers go out to the family; may the soul of this student, and the souls of all the departed, through the mercy of God rest in peace. And for those who may feel the need to do something similar, PLEASE find someone to talk to before you do something so desperate.
Additionally I think the moral discussion of suicide is something most parents should handle as different faiths take a different view of this.
To the family, you are in our prayers. May your beautiful son rest in peace and may Angels surround you, delivering to you strength and love from many who keep you in their prayers.
I hear about this yesterday while I was in 2nd period because this girl was texting her sister in schooll and her sister told her. I’ve heard that he shot himself at his house but I’ve also heard he did it in school. Does anyone know yet? We love you Adam and you did not deserve to die. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
There is no truth to the rumor that the student died at school. Please see this story based on information provided by the Harford County Sheriff’s Office: http://www.daggerpress.com/2011/11/22/death-of-patterson-mill-student-ruled-suicide-bullying-not-a-factor-investigators-say/
Quoted from Bel Air News and Views: “Patterson Mill Middle High School principal Wayne Thibeault yesterday posted a letter on the school’s website with tips to help parents talk to their children about the sad news that a student had died early Monday. Harford County Sheriff’s Office spokeswoman Monica Worrell said the 16-year-old boy was found dead by a family member in his Abingdon home at 6:40 a.m. Monday morning. Their investigation determined the Patterson Mill High School student had committed suicide and left a note behind. Worrell said their investigation turned up no evidence that bullying was involved.”
I was saddened by this. I’m just wondering why even post an article about this? This is a private matter for the family and close friends. Rumors should NEVER be repeated. It just hurts those involved with this tragic event.
To this young mans family and friends, my prayers are with you.
Include this family in your thoughts and prayers tonight. Regardless, of the ifs, whens, or whats, this family needs to find solace. My heart goes out to them….
The possibilty that this suicide was an act of pain from the bullying that was inflicted should scare us all into action. The scary thing about all of this is that bullying is in no way the cause. Though, it’s definately got to be a huge part of it. Someone posted above, saying that his father recently died. Also, simply the fact that he was in high school is a huge part of it. Children nowadays are bombarded with stress and peer pressure and bullying and all around rudeness from people around them, and I know how it feels to be in that position, as I’ve attempted suicide before. These are the thoughts we should be focusing on. We should be taking action like I’ve said above, to stop the large amount of suicides because, quite frankly, it sucks to be in any position to do with suicide. Whether you kow the person, you are the person, or you’re related to the person, or even if the news just made you unbearably sad, we all need to stick together and not let it reoccur. Because life is worth preserving, no matter how hard it is at any time, and suicide is preventable.
My daughter is a classmate and would like to attend the services. Does anyone have any information they could pass on???
My heart aches for this family and all the students at Patterson Mill.
No matter how it happened or why it happened…it happened and that in itself is a sad sad trajedy. My heart goes out to his family.
Dear Husky Parent,
services have not been set yet. If you would like the information I will pass it on once it is finalized. Please include your email address.
The family will receive friends at Schimunek Funeral Home of Bel Air, Inc., 610 W. MacPhail Rd., Bel Air MD 21014 on Friday, November 25, 2011, from 1-2 p.m., with a memorial service at 2:00 p.m. Interment private. In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made to the Patterson Mill High School Library, 85 Patterson Mill Rd., Bel Air MD 21015.